Pivotal (Embrace, Explore and Discover)

It was just recently, random morning, the day was a bit drizzly, clouds covering the sky.

Just an ordinary day, I woke up with an awful feeling. Feeling old.

25. What a number.

It is not a ripe number for human’s life span, but it is not a pale number either.

I am in between.  I still can life recklessly but there is a future that I should think more seriously.

Pivotal.

So far I acquire most of things I always wanted in my quarter of century age: professional experiences in development and policy, apartment of my own, scholarship for my master abroad.

But I lack of one thing: FUN in FREEDOM.

The classy reason is I was worry too much of everything. The chance was right in front of me, but I did not seize it. It then faded away. Not only once, it happened many times.

I was scared about the future. I was scared about the consequence to my career life and financial.

But now after securing those two, I feel like life is too boring.

I am still single, young and free, without burden.

I should do whatever I want without thinking too much of what will happen in the future.

I should be careless and relax.

I only life once. I could not repeat the moment when I still have a lot of energy and a handful of dreams. Something which construe me as a youngster.

I should embrace before I regret. Explore the world. Discover new things.

I am not gonna stick with a 9-5 working hours just because people think I have a good job.

I am not gonna be what the society think a woman should do just because they think it is right.

I don’t want be a common people if I don’t want to be.

I just wanna be myself, a person who want to live her life to the most.

A person who would not regret her past, because she is just too worried about the future.

And hei, why should I worry? The road will just lead me to the right place.

So here I am in my pivotal age. I have decided that I am gonna spread my wings, feel the breeze, taste the wind, everything!

So I will embrace, explore and discover.

Period

Me standing in front of Federation Square (Melbourne 2009)